🍬 Sugary Scoop: Embracing Connection

Welcome to the Sugary Newsletter by yours truly.  🎉 😊

🍬The Scoop 🍬

• WHAT’S NEW?

• THE SUGARY EFFECT

  • PAST EVENTS

• UPCOMING EVENTS

• AND DON’T SAY I DIDN’T TELL YOU ABOUT…

• ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

WHAT’S NEW?

Embracing Connection by Asking

Asking for Help…

(On only the most important project I have ever worked on.)

Seems simple enough, but for me it’s a foreign concept. DK tells me I have some kind of hero complex but I don’t believe that’s exactly it. True I do feel like I need to take care of everything, but it’s not because I actually want to, it’s because I just FEEL like I don’t have any other option.

Notice I highlighted the word FEEL…because the reality can be far different.

Asking for help has become a rigorous journey, akin to a navy seals boot camp. Each time I hit “send” to ask for support, I feel the weight pressing down on me. The exhaustion after these outreach efforts is both mental and physical.

My good friend, psychotherapist and mental performance coach Vin Infante used to tell me that, “Leading with vulnerability is your path to connection”.

I find this an interesting statement considering the number of “connections” I have. But what am I doing to deepen those connections?

If reciprocation is the hallmark of a healthy relationship...

I’m in self-inflicted triage.

I literally don’t provide opportunities to receive help from others.

Launching the Empathy Project is transforming me. I’m stepping WAAAAAAAAY out of my comfort zone. I’m learning to provide others the opportunity to help me, to strengthen our connections. It’s a challenge, but I'm determined to reshape my reality.

So, I’ve been reaching out with an aim to raise funds in the amount of $50,000 to help us expand our ability to get our message out into the world (putting on events, producing content, social media boosting, PR etc…). I met up with a long time friend to ask for his aid over tea. I was surprised when he didn’t even let me finish the whole way through and offered to make a significant donation of $10,000 right on the spot. $40,000 left…not a bad start for a late morning tea on a rainy Sunday.

He told me the reason for his support was for the years of friendship in making him always feel special, and he felt my heart was in the right place to be able to pull off a movement like this. I was totally stunned, not even just at the amount, or the fact that I don’t even see him all that often given he lives out West, but I was grateful for how easy he made it for me. As one of my first asks, it was certainly an encouraging response and made me feel valued and confident that I have something worth getting behind.

The Empathy Project is not just my brainchild; it’s a significant endeavor that requires a community to come together, to inspire one another and reach for greater horizons. So, I am asking for your support.

Whether its $25, $50 or $100 every bit counts toward us reaching our goal. Basically, if ~1000 of you donated $40, we’d hit our goal.

If its for any of the amounts above, you can donate HERE.

If you have the ability to give more, and you want to chat about the project let’s grab tea.

In advance, I express my heartfelt gratitude for joining me on this profound journey. Your support is invaluable, and together, we will make a difference.

THE SUGARY EFFECT

Empathy (Part 2): Embracing Empathy: A Personal Journey

In our last discussion, we delved into the nuances between sympathy and empathy. Few people recognize that sympathy by itself carries a managed level of apathy because we deliberately construct a barrier that shields us from investing too much of ourselves into another’s cause.

I think back to the time when my longtime friend Geena Rocero told me about her journey as a sequestered trans model. I was in the room when she first entertained the idea of coming out in her now seminal TED talk that shook the world stage (You can see it right HERE). It would have been easy to just feel sympathy for her struggles, acknowledging them from a distance. But instead I dared to choose empathy.

What it meant was diving deeper into Geena’s narrative. I allowed myself to be moved by her story of resilience and channeled my compassion into tangible support. From assisting her with talent for events during the early days of her organization Gender Proud, to recently organizing her spectacular book launch party for "HORSE BARBIE," her journey became more personal. It resonated with my vision of a more inclusive society.

While I can never fully comprehend Geena’s life experiences because they are not my own, the key was allowing empathy to lead me beyond mere compassion. I was inspired toward sustained action, a genuine expression of my care and concern. Empathy demands more from us. It challenges us to step into someone else’s shoes, fostering connections that go far beyond surface level.

This journey, though challenging, has been transformative. It has not only enriched my understanding of others but has also added profound purpose and meaning to my own life.

Think for a moment about points in your life where you might have been apathetic and reflect on it in order to identify opportunities for empathy going forward. Through empathy, we can strengthen the fabric of our relationships and contribute to a more compassionate world.✨

PAST EVENTS

A Sweet & Simple Picnic- Nearly 200 of you came out in force to close out the picnic season. Together with Pitch Social, everyone had their fill of food and drink and we even managed to have enough to donate to the homeless afterwards. Tezumi Tea conducted a brilliant Japanese tea ceremony for small groups in attendance to help usher in the Fall Season and also brewed enough tea for everyone to sample regardless of the ceremony itself. All in all it was a spectacular way to bid adieu to the summer months.

Sugary’s Restaurant Takeover: Perry Club - A little over 20 of you gathered on a rainy Monday to enjoy a truly limitless amount of delicious food and drink while proprietor Brandon Fay (with the assistance of his incredible staff) regaled everyone with stories and service.

Uncharitable Premiere - It was a full house that a few lucky members of the community got to be a part of as the debut for Uncharitable unveiled itself to the world. Director Stephen Gyllenhaal and Producer/Humanitarian Dan Pallotta captivated the crowd so much that by the end of the night the movie had raised and additional $100,000 on the spot to help raise awareness of the broken state of giving in the US.

UPCOMING EVENTS

October 10th @6pm - Sunday's x Sugary Wellness Soiree (Hell's Kitchen) - We’re teaming up with Sunday’s the best nail and wellness salon in the city to take a moment to celebrate female excellence. We’ll be featuring complimentary manicures and hand massages all night long while grazing off a glorious spread and refreshing yourself with a selection of beverages. This event is mainly intended for the WOMEN in our community. _{(Social Battery Level: MEDIUM Introvert/Extrovert Mix - Crowd Size 50+)}

October 17th @7pm - Empathy Project Fundraiser (Soho) As we gear up towards the launch of the Empathy Project, I am hosting a special event to help us raise funds ($50K) to expand our ability to promote and market the movement. Please join me for an amazing cocktail dinner party to celebrate and support our movement. _{(Social Battery Level: MEDIUM Introvert/Extrovert Mix - Crowd Size 50+)}

October 22nd @12pm - Zombie Tag: The 3rd Apocalypse #IYKYK, Back Due to Non-Stop Popular Demand and just in time for the season of scaries. A new zombie pandemic is about to have an outbreak in NYC. Come join the zombie nation as you hunt for dwindling survivors in our sacred historical institutions…or test your mettle as a survivalist and stand alone as the last man standing. Children’s games in serious places…let’s GOOOOO!!! _{(Social Battery Level: HIGH Extrovert - Crowd Size 100+)}

_{(Space is very limited for each of these events so if you’d like to attend to any of these events, please hit the RSVP button below sooner than later!)}

AND DON’T SAY I DIDN’T TELL YOU ABOUT…

Fish Market

Where can you get the best fried rice in NYC?

Chinatown…NO. Queens…NO. A recipe you can make at home…NO.

Dive bar near South Street Seaport…YES.

…wait what?!

Yeah…I had the same reaction too. But it’s true.

Fish Market is a wild kind of place. The dive bar brims with an energy off of college town America. The establishment is unapologetically dilapidated (The main door doesn’t even have a handle…you literally have to jimmy the door from the top with your fingers to get in) yet the energy is instantly welcoming. Proprietor Jeff Lin and his dedicated staff welcome you in and as you sit down, that’s when the magic truly begins.

Beyond the standard fare you’d naturally expect at a dive bar comes a full complement of Chinese menu options and there’s a clear star in this lineup.

They’re fried rice.

Any flavor, doesn’t matter. Get it.

(Honorable mention also to the Ginger Fish soup)

For the uninitiated, the quality of fried rice centers around ingredients and the concept of “Wok-Hei” or “wok’s breath”, the smoky flavor resulting from caramelisation of sugars, chemical reactions, and smoking of oil…basically…the seasoning of the wok.

Simply put…difficult to obtain. And it can take a looooooooong time of cooking on your wok properly to get it to that point..

Well, the Fish Market wok has seemingly been seasoned for a generation and Jeff still has his mom in the back making the dishes leading the operation.

Sounds too good to be true? I thought so…and then I tried it and what can I say…the hype is real. So buckle up to loosen that buckle, ‘cause you’ll be there awhile for some truly stellar eats.

ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

Sarah Kinsley

This New York based classically trained songstress has a delicate yet penetrating delivery.

I first discovered her scrolling randomly through TikTok back when discovery was at its prime peak on the platform.

Her songs are evocative high drama, navigating the peaks and valleys of expression from the somber depths of languishing heartache to soaring unbridled exultation…sometimes in the same song.

Her lyrical phrasing is uncommon with elements that are reminiscent of a combination between the driving rhythms of Florence and the Machine, the light and delicate delivery of Feist and slight smattering of the tempered essentricities of Bjork.

Simultaneously intuitive and esoteric, it certainly makes for interesting listening without sacrificing the melodic cohesion necessary to deliver a memorable song.

Pay attention to her…this one’s definitely on an arc towards success!

The King (popular track)

I’m Not A Mountain (lesser known track)

Lovegod (new release)

Thank you for taking the time to read to the end!

I hope you found something inspiring and meaningful in my content and until next time, explore the possibilities of NYC.

-Sugary

🍰🍭🍩🍦🍫🍪🍨🧁

PS. Don’t be shy and hit reply and tell me how you’re doing!