🍬 Sugary Scoop: To Your Health (and to mine)

Welcome to the Sugary Scoop, my free biweekly newsletter where we help you see and experience the magic of NYC that I love so much through curated events, experiences, artists, and community stories.

Let’s get to this week’s Scoop!

🍬The Scoop 🍬

• UPCOMING EVENTS

• WHAT'S NEW

  • THE SUGARY EFFECT

  • PAST EVENTS

    • AND DON’T SAY I DIDN’T TELL YOU ABOUT…

  • NOTABLE NYC EVENTS THIS WEEK FROM OUR FRIENDS

September 18th (Chinatown): APEX for Youth Fundraiser Happy Hour —  Come join us for a happy hour supporting APEX for Youth, an organization that provides opportunities for minority youth from lower-income families across the five boroughs. This time, we're here to raise $1,500 for the Apex Youth Basketball Camp, benefiting middle and high school students. Every drink you purchase brings us closer to our fundraiser goal—so let's toast to a great cause! - RSVP HERE
_{(Social Battery Level: Medium Extrovert - Crowd Size 30-40).}

September 21st (Bushwick): So Long to Summer Soiree — Join us for a lovely casual gathering as we informally kick off Climate Week with a sustainable BBQ utilizing ingredients that are sourced from sustainable local producers curated by Local Roots NYC. - RSVP HERE
_{(Social Battery Level: Medium Extrovert - Crowd Size 50-75).}

September 24th (Soho): The Best ___ You Ever Ate…(A Climate Week experiential tasting) — Join for a tasting experience of what it REALLY means to be “farm to table”.  Sample produce from a grocery store versus a sustainable farm source guided by Wenjay Ying, the founder of Local Roots NYC who has spoken at the United Nations about integrating Sustainable Development Goals into her farm-to-table business. Experience the vibrant flavors of local produce in an interactive tasting, followed by a farm-to-table dinner featuring locally sourced ingredients paired with regenerative wines. - RSVP HERE
_{(Social Battery Level: Medium Ambivert - Crowd Size 30-40).}

September 26th (Soho): The Art of Movement: A Curious Salon Inspired by Gödel, Escher & Bach — We’re hosting a very special salon exploring the concept of movement in all its forms through the lens of true visionaries. Join us for an evening of “perpetuum mobile” as we enjoy a truly transporting experience together. 
_{(Social Battery Level: Medium Ambivert - Crowd Size 30-40).}

September 28th (South Williamsburg): Soul Brunch — We are teaming up with Rafael De La Cruz as well as the ladies of YesBabe! to bring you an epic day and night party. Come get your groove on to amazing music from a host of incredible DJs, sample some delicious bites and party the day and night away in great company. - RSVP HERE
_{(Social Battery Level: High Extrovert - Crowd Size 150-200).}

_{(Space is very limited for each of these events so if you’d like to attend to any of these events, please hit the RSVP button below sooner than later!)}

Well this one’s going to be a bummer…

My mom is sick. It’s cancer and it is advanced.

There’s no point to sugar coat it as such is life. I’m far from the first and will be far from the last to have the specter of severe illness befall oneself or a family member / close relationship. It is an all too typical part of life and I know many of you can relate on a deep level.

As we all are when it first happens, I’m new to this and so I welcome any thoughts or insights any of you have on stewarding these difficult waters.

I’ve lived with the knowledge of this diagnosis for some time now but have waited to share this news so that it aligns with the point in which I would need to go abroad to handle affairs and see to her care.  

That time is now.

What does it mean for the community…

I’ve tried my best to prepare for this moment, stacking as much programming as I could prior to my departure (6-8 events in September alone) and planning out what I will try to do while I am away.

What it means is that for much of October and at least a part of November I will be MIA and you will see less programming than normal and I ask for your understanding on this.

I have discussed with DK a number of potential events that he might be open to leading in my absence. We will see what materializes from our talks. None of it has been finalized just yet but I encourage you to reach out to him if you’d like to help him in bringing some more amazing moments to share in my absence…nothing would bring me more joy and i’m sure it would be encouraging for DK to feel the support from the community in continuing the magic we try to create month after month.

Know that I’m working to ensure that my absence is as seamless as possible, and this means that there will still be some events that happen, and the newsletter will still continue as scheduled in its normal spirit and tenor along with perhaps some additional content that I may or may not post while I am abroad.  

Knowing me, I guarantee you this won’t be a seamless process, but I will certainly try my best 😅.

I may offer updates here and there regarding what I am going through and if there is anything to share it’d likely occur in The Sugary Effect, but the intended purpose of the newsletter will remain in focus, despite this inconvenient truth that I am currently dealing with. I’ll refrain from being too indulgent in this regard.

So in advance, I thank you for your understanding and devotion to our community.  

I will see you on the other side of it…

THE SUGARY EFFECT

To Your Health (and to mine)…

“You don’t have anything if you don’t have your health” or so goes that famous saying…

I believe in that statement…I really do.

Whenever I host an event, despite my best efforts to prevent attrition, inevitably a noticeable percentage (at least on average 10-15% typically) of people cancel at the last minute. Do you know the #1 reason for this?  

Health.  

Someone has come down with something, hurt themselves, has to take care of someone who is experiencing a similar malady or everything in-between.

I’ve made this observation over countless events across decades of event organizing so trust me when I say…I know what I’m talking about.  

It just shows how remarkably fragile and non-resilient we are.  

My mother was obsessively anxious about this topic. In the household, it would translate into an incessant push to eat all your vegetables, wear a jacket at even the slightest sense of a breeze outside or making sure I knew of and implemented every single bit of medical news that came across her surveying eagle eyes.

I’m pretty sure that some of this is all too familiar to many of you to varying degrees because as different as our cultures and backgrounds are…we’re remarkably similar.

Because my mother was Chinese, there was always also the added bonus of ingestible “mystical Chinese herbology” thrown into the mix around the house that she would refer to as “bu” which basically translates to “patch up” as far as health was concerned.

These exotic herbs were meant to cure all manner of ailments and fortify any aspect of our body as a cheat code to avoid our corporeal comeuppance for living our lives of excess be it perceived or actual.

Mom was an OG bio-hacker. A trendsetter if you will.

Red ginseng, goji berries, monk fruit extract were just among the many herbs she’d summon and that would surely appear in a suitcase of a visiting relative who’d successfully smuggled them through customs in a way that would impress the most exacting cartel drug leader.  

So for her entire life, my mother anxiously lorded over every aspect of preventative physical care while making the lives of everyone around her a living hell…including herself.

Ultimately, despite all the vigilance surrounding physical well-being, it turns out my mother never had her health at all.

Her obsession for longevity and wellness came at a huge cost to her mental well being which translated into taxing anxiety, aggravated fatigue, and a consistent pessimism  that would always assume the worst and never the better.

There’s a word that encapsulates this: 

FEAR.

The remarkable and tragic irony in all this is for all my mother’s efforts, she was always stressed, took ill fairly frequently and in the end still developed severe chronic illness, only as a cruel joke she’s at the sunset of her life and has done little to take personal joy in the experience of living.

Perhaps it was because of this experience of being raised by my mother in this way paired with an inner spirit of rebellion that grew ever stronger inside of me that I forged a different path.

I’ve always placed a premium on joy and mental optimism as a key component to my overall health.

Whether it’s through the joy of community interaction and support, being forgiving of myself and others, or approaching each day with genuine openness and curiosity, it all affirms an internal willingness to actually live my life and I have to believe that it has contributed to my overall health in a real way.

There’s a word that encapsulates this: 

HOPE.

Consider the evidence…

Currently, I’m medically classified as “overweight”, pre-diabetic, and my cortisol levels are through the roof. 

Yet, remarkably among my peers I rarely take ill or suffer incapacitation. In the last year I’ve maybe been sidelined twice tops based on my recollection, once when I was feeling under the weather and a severely sprained ankle which I’m currently experiencing and getting through day by day hobbling all across the city.

Now, I’m under no illusion that I absolutely need to do a better job of addressing my physical well being, I’m not arrogant enough to think that I can just defile my body and just simply get away scott free…there are ALWAYS consequences.   

But I have to believe based on my own experience that finding joy in my life plus internal peace and optimism is equally important if not more so.

As with most things, it usually comes down to a healthy balance, a Yin and Yang if you will. This is the one Chinese philosophical concept that I subscribe to more than any other. 

One doesn’t exist without the other and true balance comes with being mindful of both without obsessing to the point that it consumes you completely.

Being healthy is a state of mind, not just a state of being.

So ensure that you find your “Joi de viv”…and I’ll promise to eat my ginseng…maybe also hit the treadmill a bit…maybe…

PAST EVENTS

September 4th: Sensible Disagreement: The Political Spectrum Unraveled — Nearly 75 if you came out to hear former congressman Steve Israel, Pulitzer Prize winning columnist Bret Stephens & Leadership Out Front CEO Daniella Ballou-Ares discuss the hard work of bridging consensus and sharing first hand accounts of their experiences navigating the fraught political landscape from their own unique perspectives.  To quote Bret Stephens, “Politics is like sex, it’s frictional, it’s mutual and when it’s good, it can be generative”.

September 10th: An Evening…with a Touch of Whimsy — About 40 of you came out for an exclusive first look at one of New York City’s finest and newest speakeasies.  We indulged in some magical cocktails that were inspired from Alice in Wonderland that were as tantalizing as they were tasty. 

September 11th: Write to Read Salon Chapter IV — About 15 of you joined us for the next edition of our intimate salon at a gorgeous home in Williamsburg.  Stories from the full spectrum of human experience, pouring out and offered a fascinating look into the most vulnerable and candid corners of our consciousness.

ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

November Ultra

There are certain artists that have a voice that’s just singular… hear it once and you can pick it out again easily.  There’s just this je ne sais quoi quality about it that’s just sublime.

For Parisian singer November Ultra (whose name is derived from her birthday month + her love of Frank Ocean’s Nostalgia Ultra), it’s the quality of her tone and phrasing that stands out.

And I’ve gotta spend more time in this writing focusing on this fact.

Her voice envelops you like the softest blanket, the most delicate of fabrics yet the thread is of the strongest fiber hitting barely a whisper of a delivery yet fully in control of every note. And if that wasn’t enough she can deliver with trilingual panache (English, French and Spanish).

Her reflective lyrics along with her haunting melodies conjure waves of nostalgia and heartfelt sentiment of the tenderest form.

I honestly feel her voice is among the best in a generation and only time will tell to see whether her songwriting continues its ascent alongside in tandem.

From what I have heard so far, she’s off to a great start. I look forward to hearing her again soon and strongly urge you to check her out before she plays stadiums for surely that time will come…

Come Into My Arms (most popular)

Corazón Caramelo (lesser known song)

Soft & Tender (newest song)

NOTABLE NYC EVENTS THIS WEEK FROM OUR FRIENDS

Tue. 9/17 - THE CLIMATE IS PSYCHEDELIC: Expanding Possibilities & Pathways for Lasting Change: RSVP HERE (Use Free Code: PSYCA)

Wed. 9/18 - Call to Gather Classes: RSVP HERE

Thu. 9/19 - Becera Presents: AI Across Sectors: Breaking Silos, Building Bridges: RSVP HERE

Thu. 9/19 - Thu. 10/10 - Roger Wu Presents: The Thought Experience Part II: RSVP HERE

Sat. 9/21 - The Groovement Presents: End of Summer Redezgroove: RSVP HERE

Thu. 9/26 - Mothers Out Front (in collaboration w/ Sugary) Presents - PAUSE: A Space to Heal and Reconnect during Climate Week: RSVP HERE